Alcohol gave me wings to fly and then it took away the sky

My name is An... , and I am a recovering Alcoholic , away from my last drink since March 15, 1997.

My `drinking career' started at the age of 15, In the beginning it was just ok. I loved the effect of alcohol. I only wanted to be in the company of friends who drank. To be honest, in the initial years, I enjoyed drinking because as was within Limits. When I started my professional career in Marketing, my drinking increased. At the age
of 25 onwards I started drinking almost everyday in the evenings.

I got married at the age of 28, and by that time I was a full blown alcoholic. I remember, when I went on my Honeymoon, I carried couple of bottles with me. Gradually,my "problems" with alcohol
started. I also started having "black outs". I was not able to remember what all I had the previous night for dinner. Mornings were bad – Guilt and shame for my actions and behaviour as I had started quarrelling
with my wife and parents.

When I was 30 years old, my parents kicked me out of the house. Because of all the promises I had made to them about not drinking was of no avail. I used to sincerely promise them that I will not drink again but only God knew why I used to start all over again. Finally my wife also left me for sometime. But again because of my promises
again she came back. Sometimes I sincerely tried to do "controlled Drinking" but after one drink I could not stop…. I wanted more and more.

Then I got the message of the recovery program of Alcoholics Anonymous. A few friends visited my place and shared about their experience about the drinking and AA. I could identify with them. So I started attending AA Meetings.

There I learned that I was suffering from a disease. It was a revelation. I always thought that I was "different and I could not control my liquor" but when I saw other people with exactly the same problem and same drinking pattern, I started believing that "if these guys could recover, Why can't I"

March 15, 1997 was the day I had my last drink. In the fellowship of AA I found true friends, who could understand me and were ready to help me regarding my problem with alcohol. Here I started to believe in a "Higher Power" whom we call God. Here I received unconditional love and understanding which my wife, my family could not give.

I started loving myself. I came to believe that I have to drink or not drink for nobody else but me.

I started staying from alcohol "one day at a time." Every morning when I get up I pray to God to help me to stay away from the first drink. When I retire in the evening, I thank God for keeping me sober during the day. So One day at a time we have to stay away from drinks.

Today, My wife understands me better, I have two beautiful daughters aged 5 and 3 and I have regained the trust of my parents, friends and coworkers. I am a different man today.

For any Help in India Please visit Alcoholics Anonymous India

or call AA Helpline Nos.: 91-22-2301 6767

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